Saturday, November 9, 2013

"...that I am."

It is, it is this thing
This 'defiant towards labeling' organism
This Aura of Mine.
This drips in slowly
As though a warm needle were gently pushing through
A landscape made of wax, with a pulse
Welcome, initially, thus the escalation of "Mercury Rising..."
It's novel to me, this funny little unspoken curse
And a curse it is- if I am to remain honest,
And I am. I am.
But a fool to none-the-wiser in claiming that a 'curse' does not become me
Wired for this- this discrimination
Wired to untangle in perpetuity, this attempt at understanding.
But too true, the inherent understatement that 'yes'
...there is something more here than understanding...
The need to Master the facts is cumulative- continual
It is there that I return, suspended in my thirst to define
Locked in a limbo I love.
Questioning everything in silence
This Abyss of intrigue, where the quiet crowns my efforts.
You see, I am stuck in the transition
Not for any other noble reason than 'being'
I am flush here, in the flux of all things unanswered
And it's more sane that they remain this way
Privacy- Adored.
The multitasking of emotional discord is my calling
For I am most familiar here, in the dark foreboding,
...of all that I may, 'suppose'.
Unanswered questions gain in value, their intricacies float nearby
That visual/cerebral liaison has been made affluent in its seclusion
I am making love to concepts daily, even when they pain me
Deep down, I am carnivorously aware of my own aptitude
And I fucking love the Beast that lives here
In this hired flesh, born to do the bidding of this soul
This soul who understood the inequity of the human spirit first,
And then made to love- post trauma.
In satisfaction, I own my conflicted complexities,
Own them to perfection.

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